A bell rings, and rings, and rings.
It is moments before I awaken sufficiently to realize that my alarm is going off. Turning over, I try to convince myself it is way too early to get up. In the other bed Suzi’s snoring reminds me I must get up and shower before she wakens. Yeow — the floor is ice cold! There is no carpeting and I forgot to slip my bare feet into the shoes beside my bed. Wide awake, I close the door that separates the bedroom area from the entryway and bathroom. I am ecstatic to discover that there is plenty of hot water when I turn the shower on. Not a coffee drinker, a shower is my caffeine substitute — it wakens me, revives me, and stimulates my dream memories. Standing under the steady flow of hot water, I open each energy center and cleanse it thoroughly. The hard part is turning off the hot stream of water. The coolness of the bathroom room immediately sucks the heat back out of me, and with the intention of packing “light,” I brought no bathrobe.
Towel wrapped around me, I dash back to the bedroom and pull on the turtleneck shirt and long-johns from last night. The smell of the wood fire still lingers on my clothes — the perfect complement to a bath! Racing back to the bathroom, my blowdryer provides the heat needed to dry my hair and warm my body. The climate is dry in the Andes, so I continually slather moisturizer all over my skin. And, the hot sun at this elevation necessitates the need for SP 50 sunscreen. A bit of make-up for vanity, and I’m ready. Perfect timing, Suzi begins to stir. Back in the bedroom I put on fresh clothes that do not smell smoky, and give Suzi a morning hug and kiss. As she makes her way to the bathroom, I stuff an extra memory card for my camera, a notepad and pen, sunscreen, water, and snacks into my daypack.
Then, off to breakfast. As if on cue Jerry walks towards our room just as I close the door. One would think we have rehearsed this for the past week! The usual breakfast choices greet us — matte de coca, fresh juices, omelets, sausage links, and fresh baked rolls. I am starving, again, and everything tastes so good! Minutes before we are told, “Time to go,” Suzi walks into the dining room. Out in the courtyard Marco does a head-count and reminds everyone to take plenty of water and sunscreen because it is expected to get up into the high 70s today. For now, it is still cool so I wear a fleece jacket and long-sleeved shirt over a tee-top.
It is moments before I awaken sufficiently to realize that my alarm is going off. Turning over, I try to convince myself it is way too early to get up. In the other bed Suzi’s snoring reminds me I must get up and shower before she wakens. Yeow — the floor is ice cold! There is no carpeting and I forgot to slip my bare feet into the shoes beside my bed. Wide awake, I close the door that separates the bedroom area from the entryway and bathroom. I am ecstatic to discover that there is plenty of hot water when I turn the shower on. Not a coffee drinker, a shower is my caffeine substitute — it wakens me, revives me, and stimulates my dream memories. Standing under the steady flow of hot water, I open each energy center and cleanse it thoroughly. The hard part is turning off the hot stream of water. The coolness of the bathroom room immediately sucks the heat back out of me, and with the intention of packing “light,” I brought no bathrobe.
Towel wrapped around me, I dash back to the bedroom and pull on the turtleneck shirt and long-johns from last night. The smell of the wood fire still lingers on my clothes — the perfect complement to a bath! Racing back to the bathroom, my blowdryer provides the heat needed to dry my hair and warm my body. The climate is dry in the Andes, so I continually slather moisturizer all over my skin. And, the hot sun at this elevation necessitates the need for SP 50 sunscreen. A bit of make-up for vanity, and I’m ready. Perfect timing, Suzi begins to stir. Back in the bedroom I put on fresh clothes that do not smell smoky, and give Suzi a morning hug and kiss. As she makes her way to the bathroom, I stuff an extra memory card for my camera, a notepad and pen, sunscreen, water, and snacks into my daypack.
Then, off to breakfast. As if on cue Jerry walks towards our room just as I close the door. One would think we have rehearsed this for the past week! The usual breakfast choices greet us — matte de coca, fresh juices, omelets, sausage links, and fresh baked rolls. I am starving, again, and everything tastes so good! Minutes before we are told, “Time to go,” Suzi walks into the dining room. Out in the courtyard Marco does a head-count and reminds everyone to take plenty of water and sunscreen because it is expected to get up into the high 70s today. For now, it is still cool so I wear a fleece jacket and long-sleeved shirt over a tee-top.
The hike from our hotel into Pisa’q is about one mile. We walk alongside agricultural fields and past buildings on the side of the road that are decorated with political graffiti. Our route leads us past a bakery renowned for its empanas, but we are too early. The baker is just beginning to build fires in the ovens. The center of Pisa’q is totally unfamiliar — quiet and empty. |
At the far end of the square, we turn right and begin walking uphill past the community landfill. All kinds of garbage is strewn around, possibly by the dogs that hang out here. Soon after, we come to a series of low, broad steps that appear to climb up the hillside. Readjusting my daypack, I begin the climb.
The trail to the Temple of the Falcon, we are told, is five kilometers each way (a little more than 3 miles) with an elevation gain of 2,000 feet. The Temple is located at approximately 3,400 meters — the same elevation as Cuzco. That is 11,155 feet! Before long we pass by a guard station where we show our Cusco Historical Sites pass. Onwards and upwards we go. At first the rise up the hillside is gentle — a short series of Inka steps followed by an easy sloping path. As the sun begins to rise, off comes my fleece jacket. My first “test” of courage comes at a ravine crossing. I must negotiate across two logs that have been bound together by rope. Not keen on heights, one way I prepared for this trip was to push myself to ride a roller coaster at Disneyland that loops around upside down. Once on the other side of the ravine, I breathe easier. In truth, it was not that scary. There was no raging river below, and the distance between logs and the ground below was only about eight feet.
The trail narrows and begins a steeper ascent facilitated by a series of switchbacks. Up above, somewhere on the mountain, comes the sound of a flute being played. Beautiful and mesmerizing, the melody draws me along. Rounding a bend I turn and look back, and realize for the first time that instead of being at the back of the pack as I had imagined, almost everyone is far below and have not even reached the ravine. Feeling energetic and strong, I call out to Jerry and Joy, who are in front of me. Joy admits that she, too, imagined herself lagging behind. With renewed energy, we push on. Rounding another bend we encounter a Q’ero woman who hands me a small bunch of a green tiny leafed plant. She gestures for me to eat the leaves. “Gracias,” I say while reaching into a pocket for a coin. The leaves have no discernible taste and though I have no idea what it is, I set the intention that it will help get me up the mountain. Later I learn that it was a young coca plant, which is used medicinally in the Andes for a variety of reasons including oxygenating the blood to increase stamina.
We pause on a relatively flat stretch of trail for a brief rest stop. Jerry hands me my water bottle from the back of my pack. Having no sense of distance or time, I drink only a few sips to quench my thirst. Doña Berna, wearing her traditional layered skirts and sandals, and Gloria, another member of our group, catch up to us. Gloria shares that several months ago she was in traction for a severe back injury. We high-five each other for the resiliency of our bodies, and the power of the mind, body and spirit.
The trail to the Temple of the Falcon, we are told, is five kilometers each way (a little more than 3 miles) with an elevation gain of 2,000 feet. The Temple is located at approximately 3,400 meters — the same elevation as Cuzco. That is 11,155 feet! Before long we pass by a guard station where we show our Cusco Historical Sites pass. Onwards and upwards we go. At first the rise up the hillside is gentle — a short series of Inka steps followed by an easy sloping path. As the sun begins to rise, off comes my fleece jacket. My first “test” of courage comes at a ravine crossing. I must negotiate across two logs that have been bound together by rope. Not keen on heights, one way I prepared for this trip was to push myself to ride a roller coaster at Disneyland that loops around upside down. Once on the other side of the ravine, I breathe easier. In truth, it was not that scary. There was no raging river below, and the distance between logs and the ground below was only about eight feet.
The trail narrows and begins a steeper ascent facilitated by a series of switchbacks. Up above, somewhere on the mountain, comes the sound of a flute being played. Beautiful and mesmerizing, the melody draws me along. Rounding a bend I turn and look back, and realize for the first time that instead of being at the back of the pack as I had imagined, almost everyone is far below and have not even reached the ravine. Feeling energetic and strong, I call out to Jerry and Joy, who are in front of me. Joy admits that she, too, imagined herself lagging behind. With renewed energy, we push on. Rounding another bend we encounter a Q’ero woman who hands me a small bunch of a green tiny leafed plant. She gestures for me to eat the leaves. “Gracias,” I say while reaching into a pocket for a coin. The leaves have no discernible taste and though I have no idea what it is, I set the intention that it will help get me up the mountain. Later I learn that it was a young coca plant, which is used medicinally in the Andes for a variety of reasons including oxygenating the blood to increase stamina.
We pause on a relatively flat stretch of trail for a brief rest stop. Jerry hands me my water bottle from the back of my pack. Having no sense of distance or time, I drink only a few sips to quench my thirst. Doña Berna, wearing her traditional layered skirts and sandals, and Gloria, another member of our group, catch up to us. Gloria shares that several months ago she was in traction for a severe back injury. We high-five each other for the resiliency of our bodies, and the power of the mind, body and spirit.
The continuing sound of the flute draws us on. Soon the trail becomes very straight and narrow, bordered on the uphill side by a five-foot Inka wall. Looking up, I realize it is part of extensive agricultural terracing. Bisecting the terracing is a steep and straight series of steps, which appears to be the “quick” route to where we are heading — the top of the mountain. |
The alternative route is to continue on the more gradually ascending trail. doña Berna, Jerry, Joy, Gloria and I choose the gentler trail. Though longer, we are rewarded by beautiful views of the valley below and the opportunity to wander through archeological ruins from the later Colonial period. Some in our group, we learn later, opted to climb the steep steps and now have pulled muscles. Rounding another bend, the sound of the flute becomes louder, and then I see it is Francesco who has been our “Pan,” helping to energetically pull us up the mountain with his beautiful music! From here, too, I can see the Temple of the Falcon. We are almost there!
Continuing our ascent around several more bends we reach the Temple. The views are magnificent! A tributary of the Amazon River, the Waykeymayu River flows below. Later it transforms into the Urubamba River below the town of the same name. The holy mountain of the Sacred Valley, Pachatusan, and agricultural terracing is visible across the river. |
After a small tour group concludes its visit, the Temple is all ours. When the last of our group arrives, we gather for a brief historical talk presented by one of our local guides. We learn that the Temple was built between the 14th and 15th centuries, during the reign of Pachakutec, the “earth shaker,” a high-period of Inka civilization. As was the tradition, the Temple of the Falcon was built upon an older, pre-Inka site to pay homage to Pachamama, the Eternal Mother who is represented as Mother Earth, and the apus , which are deities that reside at the holy mountains and represent the Creator.
We are told there are principally three levels of stonework found at the Temple of the Falcon. These can be differentiated in two ways: by age and based upon the style of architecture employed. By age, there are remnants of Early-Inka, High-Inka and Post-Inka. Architectural structures include temples, those that housed nobility, and those that were constructed for servants. |
Exploring the site, the guide points out stone knobs on some of the inner walls. Anthropologists believe these were used to hang ceremonial objects. Temples, such this one, were built at locations that had to meet two criteria: good, stable soil, and the availability of water for drinking and bathing. |
We are told the Inka were able to create architectural masterpieces such as the Temple of the Falcon because the early Inka had plenty of food and spiritual ayni — they lived in right-relationship with all of life. At the end of his talk, the guide points out caves on the far hillside where the dead were buried. With sadness in his voice, he tells us that grave robbers have looted these sacred resting places.
Despacho Ceremony
Despacho Ceremony
Inside one of the roofless stonewalled structures the Q’ero medicine people are readying for a despacho ceremony. A despacho is a recapitulated metaphor for life, depicting a person’s or a group’s landscape — inner and outer — used by Andean shamans like a canvas on which they create the “art” of life. The primary purpose for creating a despacho is to bring forth ayni. |
A simple word with complex meaning, ayni describes harmony and balance that is attained through right-relationship — right-thinking (yachay), right-doing (llankay), and right-loving (munay).
Medicine people, I am learning, are driven by vision, which is the pathway to Becoming — the evolution of consciousness. Therefore, the “landscape” portrayed in the despacho includes the person’s or group’s level of power (conscious awareness); relationships to family, friends, colleagues, to other engagements; and to nature itself. Shamans understand that knowing your vision is not necessary. What is essential is being in ayni with the tapestry of life so you are available to your Becoming.
The ceremony surrounding the construction of a despacho is a gift of love and an act of communion, through prayer, with the organizing principles that form our beliefs. In the Andean cosmology these include the three Worlds and the elemental forces associated with each. For instance, the Upper World (Hanaqpacha) is symbolized by the apus, the mountain deities associated with the Creator, and Apuchine (condor), which represents our trans-temporal nature and helps us to create wholeness through vision. The Middle World (Kaypacha) is the one in which we live: ordinary reality. It is symbolized by Chokinchinchay (rainbow jaguar), who has mastered the crafting of relationships and maintains the flow of energy exclusive of ego. The Lower World (Uhupacha) is symbolized by Pachamama, our eternal mother associated with Mother Earth, and Amaru (the great serpent), which is seen in the night sky as the Milky Way that represents the creative or evolutionary force in everything, and that connects heaven and earth — the three Worlds.
Living in the Middle World, shamans know that our primary engagement with life has to do with relationships — the quality of our relationship to self, others and to everything else — animate and inanimate. In contrast, our relationship to the Upper World is characterized by vision and destiny — qualities that are outside of time and space (nonmaterial). The quality of our connection to this realm expands or restricts our ability to be stewards of our community (allyu). The Lower World holds and nurtures the seeds of creation — qualities that are also outside of time and space. The quality of our connection to this realm makes it either easier or more difficult to manifest our dreams and visions in the Middle World.
In the Andean cosmology apus are very important because they hold the knowledge of the ancestors of this tradition and of all medicine people. This non-physical body of knowledge, known in theosophy as the akashic records, is accessed through a heightened state of consciousness called luminous awareness. It is a nonlinear state of consciousness, outside of time and space.
There are four primary types of despachos — health, balance (ayni), family, and spiritual evolution —and more than 300 known variations that are used. The despachos of Q’ero medicine people are simple. They are made with coca leaves that hold prayers for vision and one’s availability to be in right-relationship (ayni) with all aspects of life. Grains, including white corn, are liberally used to represent taking co-creative responsibility with Pachamama and evolution, and to nurture prayers. Sugar and candy symbolize fulfillment, fruition, success, and are used to sweeten prayers. All despachos animistically depict the process — cycle — by which a “seed” of vision is nurtured into fruition, and then returns to “seed” a new vision.
A cycle is a conjunction of time and space, and can be described as a day, a week, a month, a year, the period from birthday to birthday or anniversary, a period spent engaged in a particular activity, or seven-year increments. Because beliefs we are invested in are contained within each cycle, it is important to note that we continually engage in overlapping cycles and we are the sum of our pachas manifested in physical form. This means there is plenty of opportunity to carry forward, from cycle to cycle, conflicting beliefs or beliefs that do not regularly get reexamined so they can either be refined or discarded. Further, to complete a cycle requires that a vision come to fruition, and “seed” a subsequent vision. Since “being in ayni” requires us to be in right-relationship with all our pachas, it becomes apparent that another problem many of us create for ourselves is juggling too many never-ending cycles in our lives.
Medicine people, I am learning, are driven by vision, which is the pathway to Becoming — the evolution of consciousness. Therefore, the “landscape” portrayed in the despacho includes the person’s or group’s level of power (conscious awareness); relationships to family, friends, colleagues, to other engagements; and to nature itself. Shamans understand that knowing your vision is not necessary. What is essential is being in ayni with the tapestry of life so you are available to your Becoming.
The ceremony surrounding the construction of a despacho is a gift of love and an act of communion, through prayer, with the organizing principles that form our beliefs. In the Andean cosmology these include the three Worlds and the elemental forces associated with each. For instance, the Upper World (Hanaqpacha) is symbolized by the apus, the mountain deities associated with the Creator, and Apuchine (condor), which represents our trans-temporal nature and helps us to create wholeness through vision. The Middle World (Kaypacha) is the one in which we live: ordinary reality. It is symbolized by Chokinchinchay (rainbow jaguar), who has mastered the crafting of relationships and maintains the flow of energy exclusive of ego. The Lower World (Uhupacha) is symbolized by Pachamama, our eternal mother associated with Mother Earth, and Amaru (the great serpent), which is seen in the night sky as the Milky Way that represents the creative or evolutionary force in everything, and that connects heaven and earth — the three Worlds.
Living in the Middle World, shamans know that our primary engagement with life has to do with relationships — the quality of our relationship to self, others and to everything else — animate and inanimate. In contrast, our relationship to the Upper World is characterized by vision and destiny — qualities that are outside of time and space (nonmaterial). The quality of our connection to this realm expands or restricts our ability to be stewards of our community (allyu). The Lower World holds and nurtures the seeds of creation — qualities that are also outside of time and space. The quality of our connection to this realm makes it either easier or more difficult to manifest our dreams and visions in the Middle World.
In the Andean cosmology apus are very important because they hold the knowledge of the ancestors of this tradition and of all medicine people. This non-physical body of knowledge, known in theosophy as the akashic records, is accessed through a heightened state of consciousness called luminous awareness. It is a nonlinear state of consciousness, outside of time and space.
There are four primary types of despachos — health, balance (ayni), family, and spiritual evolution —and more than 300 known variations that are used. The despachos of Q’ero medicine people are simple. They are made with coca leaves that hold prayers for vision and one’s availability to be in right-relationship (ayni) with all aspects of life. Grains, including white corn, are liberally used to represent taking co-creative responsibility with Pachamama and evolution, and to nurture prayers. Sugar and candy symbolize fulfillment, fruition, success, and are used to sweeten prayers. All despachos animistically depict the process — cycle — by which a “seed” of vision is nurtured into fruition, and then returns to “seed” a new vision.
A cycle is a conjunction of time and space, and can be described as a day, a week, a month, a year, the period from birthday to birthday or anniversary, a period spent engaged in a particular activity, or seven-year increments. Because beliefs we are invested in are contained within each cycle, it is important to note that we continually engage in overlapping cycles and we are the sum of our pachas manifested in physical form. This means there is plenty of opportunity to carry forward, from cycle to cycle, conflicting beliefs or beliefs that do not regularly get reexamined so they can either be refined or discarded. Further, to complete a cycle requires that a vision come to fruition, and “seed” a subsequent vision. Since “being in ayni” requires us to be in right-relationship with all our pachas, it becomes apparent that another problem many of us create for ourselves is juggling too many never-ending cycles in our lives.
When we accept all aspects of our life, we become free to live elegantly and celebrate life. | Recapitulating our relationships and engagements through despachos, sand paintings, and other means, helps us to delineate our pachas, recognize the mythologies that drive us, and bring conscious awareness to the momentums — probabilities out of the infinite possibilities that are available to us — so we understand the probability of completing a vision, discovering our gifts, and deciphering where healing needs to occur in our life. |
Once done, we can more consciously create closure by forgiving those who need to be forgiven, loving those who need to be acknowledged, bringing completion to those things that have already come to fruition, and letting go or renegotiating those that have not. When we accept all aspects of our life, we become free to live elegantly and celebrate life.
Quiet descends as the Q’ero shaman begin the despacho ceremony in prayer. A “canvas” of wrapping paper about three-feet square is spread out in front of don Humberto and don Mariano, who jointly will lead the ceremony. Sugar is poured in a circle on the paper to represent our group. Lots of sugar is used in a despacho to symbolize love and the sweetness of life. It is also the key ingredient to sweeten the prayers that will be placed in the despacho. |
Prayers are vitally important in making despachos because they carry one of the three-forms of life-force, kausay wayra. Simply translated: air and oxygen. However, this form of life-force also pertains to ideas, inspiration and information. Breath is used to renew kausay or life-force, and as a way to gather information (inhalation) and, in the case of prayers, transmitting information (exhalation). The use of breath in any of these ways enables medicine people to stay impersonal. The other two expressions of life-force are kausay pacha, which includes food, the place where our home is located, kundalini energy and water; and kausay kanchay or light.
A shaman’s power is commensurate with the quality of their prayers because prayers hold the potential to change a momentum and thus affect outcome — including wholeness. There are four fundamental themes all prayers must include for wholeness to occur — fertility, light, ayni and well-being. Fertility has to do with our capacity to be a co-creative participant in life, and live in harmony with the cycles that are in play. It requires presence and the ability to be pro-active, creative and fluid. This is no easy feat because the ego is not adaptive. Light refers to energy and, more specifically, our evolutionary journey to “grow” the level of our consciousness. Ayni, as previously described, has to do with being in right-relationship: right-thinking, right-loving, and right-action. To do so requires us to take responsibility for our beliefs and thoughts, our emotions, and our actions. We must be able to anticipate effect and operate “upstream” rather than from the place of reaction. Nested within the theme of well-being is balance and embracing expressions of energy that affect our ability to be in harmony with the previously mentioned three principles. This requires us to be available to vision, to honor the health of our family and our communities, including plant life, animals, and the environment, and to manage our personal energy so physical/emotional/mental/spiritual balance in present.
Doña Bernadino spreads open a beautifully woven mestana cloth full of coca leaves. She directs us through pantomime to pick up three and place one on top of another, face-up and stem down to form a k’intu. Into the k’intu, she instructs us to breathe our prayers for this trip and any attachments that keep us from fully being present in this experience. My k’intu holds prayers to release my ego’s “need to know,” to trust my soul’s evolution will be informed by experience, and to open my heart more fully so my life may be crafted from love — unconditional love.
The number “three” again. Besides referring to the three Worlds, it also signifies the three primary energy centers associated with the third eye (yachay: thinking), heart center (munay: emotions), and belly (llankay: action). Mastering the art of k’intus is tremendously important in mountain shamanism. It involves presence, unconditional love, intention, and non-attachment to outcome. And, just like prayers and a shaman’s mesa, k’intus open portals to expanded states of consciousness and to feel Spirit’s presence.
Next, doña Bernadino encourages to make k’intus for others we may be holding in our hearts and in our mesas. I make two more. The first is for my husband Rick and the other is for my father and daughter clients. When our individual prayers are completed, the k’intus are passed, clockwise, from one to another. Everyone adds their prayer for fulfillment. As doña Bernadina receives each k’intu, she adds either a red or white flower petal. Red symbolizes Pachamama, the life-giving blood of Mother Earth. The white petals represent the apus or mountain spirits and the glacial waters that are the source of the Amazon River and life. She then passes the ki’intus to don Mariano and don Humberto who place them in a circle on the “canvas.” Before long the despacho resembles a beautiful red and white dotted, green-leafed wreath.
Energy builds within and around us. I experience it as sweet and soft. In time, seeds and grains are passed around. I choose amaranth and infuse it with a prayer (breath) that these seeds nurture the prayers held in the k’intus so they grow to be big and strong through love, wisdom and impeccability. Then, one by one we go up and “feed” our seeds and grains, clockwise, over the k’intus.
While don Humberto and don Mariano continue to build the despacho, we make k’intus that contain prayers for one another. Often my prayer is for my “sister” or “brother” to become more present and available to the knowledge we are receiving. Others are for opening the heart more unconditionally. We make, exchange and eat the k’intus so we more fully embody the prayers of others for our behalf. This ceremony is called halpay. We consume many, many k’intus!
Meanwhile, don Humberto and don Mariano add ingredients to the despacho including rice, a shell, a llama fetus decorated with llama fat, little figurines, gold and silver foil, candies, corn, incense, beans, and confetti. Each element represents an aspect of stepping into our Becoming; our evolution of consciousness. Cords of cotton are then laid on top to enclose all the elements. This differentiates above and below, conscious time and dream time. When complete, the despacho is carefully folded, in a symbolically prescribed way, into a neat package. First, the bottom third portion of the wrapping paper (lower world) is folded over middle section that contains the mandala. Next, the top third portion (Upper World) is folded down over the middle section. The left-side third portion (feminine) is folded over the center. Lastly, the right-side third portion(masculine) is folded back over the center. The despacho is then securely tied with a piece of red thread. Don Humberto invites us to place our mesas on the despacho for a blessing — it is a beautiful sight with many colors, textile patterns, sizes — one on top of another.
The last part of the ceremony involves the cleansing of our luminous energy fields by each medicine person. Using a sweet-sounding bell, doña Bernadina cleanses the front and back of my luminous body. She is so short that at 5’ 4” I need to bend down for her to cleanse the very crown of my energy body. Next, the stones in don Mariano’s mesa make a loud thump (and bump) as he vigorously cleanses the crown of my head and yachay energy center (third eye), and then thoroughly runs his mesa up and down my body. As don Humberto approaches, tears of joy and thankfulness spontaneously pour out of me. The tears are for being here, and most especially for Spirit continuing to grant me life. Similarly, currents of electrical energy course up and down my spine as doña Berna approaches and begins cleansing me with her mesa. It is no longer a wonder why I have healing sessions with both of these incredible medicine people!
The sun is warm on my back and shoulders as the ceremony comes to completion. During our next fire ceremony the despacho will be burned so our prayers and our attachments to them can be transformed to power. The tiredness I previously felt is long gone. In fact, I feel exhilarated — so much so that I decide to hike back down to Pisa’q rather than take the bus.
A shaman’s power is commensurate with the quality of their prayers because prayers hold the potential to change a momentum and thus affect outcome — including wholeness. There are four fundamental themes all prayers must include for wholeness to occur — fertility, light, ayni and well-being. Fertility has to do with our capacity to be a co-creative participant in life, and live in harmony with the cycles that are in play. It requires presence and the ability to be pro-active, creative and fluid. This is no easy feat because the ego is not adaptive. Light refers to energy and, more specifically, our evolutionary journey to “grow” the level of our consciousness. Ayni, as previously described, has to do with being in right-relationship: right-thinking, right-loving, and right-action. To do so requires us to take responsibility for our beliefs and thoughts, our emotions, and our actions. We must be able to anticipate effect and operate “upstream” rather than from the place of reaction. Nested within the theme of well-being is balance and embracing expressions of energy that affect our ability to be in harmony with the previously mentioned three principles. This requires us to be available to vision, to honor the health of our family and our communities, including plant life, animals, and the environment, and to manage our personal energy so physical/emotional/mental/spiritual balance in present.
Doña Bernadino spreads open a beautifully woven mestana cloth full of coca leaves. She directs us through pantomime to pick up three and place one on top of another, face-up and stem down to form a k’intu. Into the k’intu, she instructs us to breathe our prayers for this trip and any attachments that keep us from fully being present in this experience. My k’intu holds prayers to release my ego’s “need to know,” to trust my soul’s evolution will be informed by experience, and to open my heart more fully so my life may be crafted from love — unconditional love.
The number “three” again. Besides referring to the three Worlds, it also signifies the three primary energy centers associated with the third eye (yachay: thinking), heart center (munay: emotions), and belly (llankay: action). Mastering the art of k’intus is tremendously important in mountain shamanism. It involves presence, unconditional love, intention, and non-attachment to outcome. And, just like prayers and a shaman’s mesa, k’intus open portals to expanded states of consciousness and to feel Spirit’s presence.
Next, doña Bernadino encourages to make k’intus for others we may be holding in our hearts and in our mesas. I make two more. The first is for my husband Rick and the other is for my father and daughter clients. When our individual prayers are completed, the k’intus are passed, clockwise, from one to another. Everyone adds their prayer for fulfillment. As doña Bernadina receives each k’intu, she adds either a red or white flower petal. Red symbolizes Pachamama, the life-giving blood of Mother Earth. The white petals represent the apus or mountain spirits and the glacial waters that are the source of the Amazon River and life. She then passes the ki’intus to don Mariano and don Humberto who place them in a circle on the “canvas.” Before long the despacho resembles a beautiful red and white dotted, green-leafed wreath.
Energy builds within and around us. I experience it as sweet and soft. In time, seeds and grains are passed around. I choose amaranth and infuse it with a prayer (breath) that these seeds nurture the prayers held in the k’intus so they grow to be big and strong through love, wisdom and impeccability. Then, one by one we go up and “feed” our seeds and grains, clockwise, over the k’intus.
While don Humberto and don Mariano continue to build the despacho, we make k’intus that contain prayers for one another. Often my prayer is for my “sister” or “brother” to become more present and available to the knowledge we are receiving. Others are for opening the heart more unconditionally. We make, exchange and eat the k’intus so we more fully embody the prayers of others for our behalf. This ceremony is called halpay. We consume many, many k’intus!
Meanwhile, don Humberto and don Mariano add ingredients to the despacho including rice, a shell, a llama fetus decorated with llama fat, little figurines, gold and silver foil, candies, corn, incense, beans, and confetti. Each element represents an aspect of stepping into our Becoming; our evolution of consciousness. Cords of cotton are then laid on top to enclose all the elements. This differentiates above and below, conscious time and dream time. When complete, the despacho is carefully folded, in a symbolically prescribed way, into a neat package. First, the bottom third portion of the wrapping paper (lower world) is folded over middle section that contains the mandala. Next, the top third portion (Upper World) is folded down over the middle section. The left-side third portion (feminine) is folded over the center. Lastly, the right-side third portion(masculine) is folded back over the center. The despacho is then securely tied with a piece of red thread. Don Humberto invites us to place our mesas on the despacho for a blessing — it is a beautiful sight with many colors, textile patterns, sizes — one on top of another.
The last part of the ceremony involves the cleansing of our luminous energy fields by each medicine person. Using a sweet-sounding bell, doña Bernadina cleanses the front and back of my luminous body. She is so short that at 5’ 4” I need to bend down for her to cleanse the very crown of my energy body. Next, the stones in don Mariano’s mesa make a loud thump (and bump) as he vigorously cleanses the crown of my head and yachay energy center (third eye), and then thoroughly runs his mesa up and down my body. As don Humberto approaches, tears of joy and thankfulness spontaneously pour out of me. The tears are for being here, and most especially for Spirit continuing to grant me life. Similarly, currents of electrical energy course up and down my spine as doña Berna approaches and begins cleansing me with her mesa. It is no longer a wonder why I have healing sessions with both of these incredible medicine people!
The sun is warm on my back and shoulders as the ceremony comes to completion. During our next fire ceremony the despacho will be burned so our prayers and our attachments to them can be transformed to power. The tiredness I previously felt is long gone. In fact, I feel exhilarated — so much so that I decide to hike back down to Pisa’q rather than take the bus.
Walking into town, Suzi, Jerry, Joy and I decide to stop for a very late lunch and something cold and refreshing to drink. On the corner of the square is a brown-colored restaurant with white umbrellas outside. It is owned by a German woman and is well-known for its pizza. Unfortunately, not being market day, there is no pizza. Instead I order a delicious vegetable quiche and fresh fruit smoothy. Food and a bathroom — it takes so little to feel as if I am in heaven! |
Reading Coca Leaves
Arriving back at the hotel, we learn that don Mariano will give a presentation on divination at 4 p.m. There is just time to shower and change into warmer clothes. Since don Mariano only speaks Quechua, one of our guides will serve as interpreter.
Looking at us with his soft, kind eyes, don Mariano tells us he will speak about reading coca leaves as a divination tool. The job of a shaman, he elaborates, is to observe how everything is related. “Everything is a relationship of effect, not cause. Reason or cause is never important, only the effect.” There is, in fact, no word for “why” in the Quechua language. Instead their focus is in “how” — how does this or that live in you. For instance: How does scarcity live in you? Do you ever feel that you do not have enough emotional support, financial resources, skills or abilities? How does abandonment live in you? Do you shut down in relationships so you cannot be emotionally hurt? Or, do you end relationships before your partner has the chance to first? How does jealousy live in you? How does envy live in you?
While picking up a dozen leaves, don Mariano tells us he will divine about our expedition. Arranging the leaves face-up, stems-down, he mumbles a prayer as he throws the stack with a flick of his wrist. He repeats this process four more times. No expression crosses his face. His focus is singular as he tracks the sequence of patterns made by the leaves to understand our group’s relationship to availability, wellbeing, and success. Without turning to look at the interpreter, don Mariano says, “Everything is perfectly aligned for this trip. It will be a happy trip.” We break out in applause — perhaps mostly out of relief!
One of the women in our group, who is originally from Guatemala, asks how we will do with the altitude ( up to 17,500 feet), and will we make it to the Rainbow Lagoon? Don Mariano reassembles the coca leaves and again throws five times. The interpreter inquires about some aspect of his reading before translating: “Some of you will have difficulty, but it will not be serious.” Someone in the audience makes an audible gasp. The interpreter continues, “It is very important for everyone to begin sending luminous threads to the mountain to help prepare. Yes, we will go to the Rainbow Lagoon.” Someone asks whether we will hear the Inka Prophesy at the Rainbow Lagoon. Don Mariano divines that it could go either way. The Guatemalan woman suggests instead of a question free-for-all, perhaps don Mariano would consent to divine an answer for a question from each of us. We all respond favorably to her suggestion, which is translated into Quechua. Don Mariano nods his head “yes.” I am so in love with the peace and sweetness this dear man radiates.
Another woman asks about a friend who is very sick. “Will he die while I am here in Peru?” she asks. Gathering up the twelve coca leaves, don Mariano throws them. Once. Twice. Three times. Then again, and again. Pointing to the leaves, he says something to the interpreter. As she begins to translate, the Guatemalan woman stops her and asks something in Spanish, which is answered in the same language. Very quietly, almost reverently, the Guatemalan woman says, “Your friend is very sick and will not recover. However, his crossing over will take more time than your trip here.” The other woman nods, and turns to don Mariano bowing her head in gratitude for the information. Anguish shows on her face.
Arriving back at the hotel, we learn that don Mariano will give a presentation on divination at 4 p.m. There is just time to shower and change into warmer clothes. Since don Mariano only speaks Quechua, one of our guides will serve as interpreter.
Looking at us with his soft, kind eyes, don Mariano tells us he will speak about reading coca leaves as a divination tool. The job of a shaman, he elaborates, is to observe how everything is related. “Everything is a relationship of effect, not cause. Reason or cause is never important, only the effect.” There is, in fact, no word for “why” in the Quechua language. Instead their focus is in “how” — how does this or that live in you. For instance: How does scarcity live in you? Do you ever feel that you do not have enough emotional support, financial resources, skills or abilities? How does abandonment live in you? Do you shut down in relationships so you cannot be emotionally hurt? Or, do you end relationships before your partner has the chance to first? How does jealousy live in you? How does envy live in you?
While picking up a dozen leaves, don Mariano tells us he will divine about our expedition. Arranging the leaves face-up, stems-down, he mumbles a prayer as he throws the stack with a flick of his wrist. He repeats this process four more times. No expression crosses his face. His focus is singular as he tracks the sequence of patterns made by the leaves to understand our group’s relationship to availability, wellbeing, and success. Without turning to look at the interpreter, don Mariano says, “Everything is perfectly aligned for this trip. It will be a happy trip.” We break out in applause — perhaps mostly out of relief!
One of the women in our group, who is originally from Guatemala, asks how we will do with the altitude ( up to 17,500 feet), and will we make it to the Rainbow Lagoon? Don Mariano reassembles the coca leaves and again throws five times. The interpreter inquires about some aspect of his reading before translating: “Some of you will have difficulty, but it will not be serious.” Someone in the audience makes an audible gasp. The interpreter continues, “It is very important for everyone to begin sending luminous threads to the mountain to help prepare. Yes, we will go to the Rainbow Lagoon.” Someone asks whether we will hear the Inka Prophesy at the Rainbow Lagoon. Don Mariano divines that it could go either way. The Guatemalan woman suggests instead of a question free-for-all, perhaps don Mariano would consent to divine an answer for a question from each of us. We all respond favorably to her suggestion, which is translated into Quechua. Don Mariano nods his head “yes.” I am so in love with the peace and sweetness this dear man radiates.
Another woman asks about a friend who is very sick. “Will he die while I am here in Peru?” she asks. Gathering up the twelve coca leaves, don Mariano throws them. Once. Twice. Three times. Then again, and again. Pointing to the leaves, he says something to the interpreter. As she begins to translate, the Guatemalan woman stops her and asks something in Spanish, which is answered in the same language. Very quietly, almost reverently, the Guatemalan woman says, “Your friend is very sick and will not recover. However, his crossing over will take more time than your trip here.” The other woman nods, and turns to don Mariano bowing her head in gratitude for the information. Anguish shows on her face.
Several more people ask questions before I speak out. “Don Mariano,” I say, “why have I been called to Ausangate?” He looks deeply into my eyes and again gathers up the coca leaves. With a flick of his wrist he throws. So caught up in the moment, I can only assume he threw them five times. Looking into my eyes again, he speaks to the interpreter, who in turn translates “All the visions you hold will be revealed when you are on Ausangate.” Involuntarily my body begins to tremble with joy that the dreams I have been having contain truth. I say a prayer to Spirit affirming my availability to receive visions. Looking directly into don Mariano’s eyes, I smile and with hands in prayer position, bow. | "Why have I been called to Ausangate?," I ask. Looking deeply into my eyes, don Mariano says, "All the visions you hold will be revealed when you are on Ausangate." |
Later don Mariano is asked “What brought us all together on this particular trip?” After throwing the coca leaves five times, he answers “Pachamama and the apus called us for different reasons. Some of you are being called to work with Pachamama and others with the apus, but all of you are being called to be in ayni.” With a smile and sideways glance at the interpreter, he impishly continues, “You will find out on this trip!”
Pachamama, the archetypal symbol for feminine, earth energy is the principle realm that pampamesayoq medicine people work. Each shaman traveling with us is a pampamesayoq. In contrast, the apus symbolize the masculine energy associated with Spirit, which is principally the domain of altomesayoq shamans.
The interpreter continues, “don Mariano says ‘you will know in our hearts whether it is principally Pachamama or the apus that inform you and pull you to serve yourselves and others.’” Hearing this, I flash to my dream in Cuzco — I was called to Ausangate to remember the original matrix embedded in my luminous energy field. This matrix will reveal the vision for my Becoming — a vision organized around cooperation, collaboration, respect and honor for the benefit of all life.
In closing, don Mariano tells us he has had many mentors who taught him to trust the visions he receives through the coca leaves. “Each healer develops their own way. I have always found it most beneficial to be in close contact with both the apus and Pachamama.”
Since my healing session with doña Berna has been rescheduled for an hour later, I join several others for a hot cup of matta de coca in the lounge. Not surprisingly our conversation revolves around the information don Mariano shared with us. Turning to Jerry, I ask if he is willing to balance my energy centers, which will ground me in my body so I can be fully present for this evening’s healing session.
I love experiencing this form of energy work — to feel suspended in weightlessness and timelessness, and connected by thin luminous threads to the heartbeat of the Universe. It opens me to receive information that is not filtered by my ego or past experience. As a daily practice, I spend time in expanded states of consciousness, but because there are no other practitioners in this tradition who live near, times like this are a real treat.
Jerry has a gift for creating beautiful sacred space and ceremony. After lighting incense, he calls in the directions and lineage to be present and work through him. Lying on my bed, he kneels beside it and reminds me to use my breathing to connect to my essential Self. Twenty-minutes later, the attunement complete, I am totally relaxed and my mind is at peace. During dinner, Jerry shares his experience and the silent conversations he had to bring my energy centers into balance. This information, coupled with my own experience, confirms that the despacho healing from doña Berna will be for ayni.
A Healing Session with doña Berna
Doña Berna is readying her space when I arrive. Laid out before her is a piece of white wrapping paper. Smiling broadly, we greet each other with a hug and kiss. Her warmth and authenticity radiate. It is hard to believe that we just met yesterday. Saying a few words, in Spanish, I look blankly and say, “No” apologetically. Motioning to one of our guides, she asks him to translate. “Doña Berna wants to know if you want an ayni despacho?” he asks. “Yes,” I reply nodding my head emphatically while smiling back at doña Berna. I am so excited — this is the first time a despacho has been made just for me. Though I am seated and doña Berna is standing, she barely leans over to kiss the crown of my head. Placing a hand over mine, she smiles.
In Peru, despacho kits can be bought at a shaman’s market, such as the one near Santa Clara Market in Cuzco. The kits are wrapped bundles that include all the necessary ingredients such as sugar, corn, beans, seeds, confetti, llama fat and a dried llama fetus, as well as objects like figurines and a small shell. Each of these are individually wrapped in small packets of securely folded newsprint.
Opening one of these despacho kits, doña Berna hands me several small packets and motions for me to open them. This will clearly be a healing and teaching session! Carefully, we open the despacho ingredients. Once the sugar is found, doña Berna begins constructing the despacho. Some of the sugar is used to make a circle on the wrapping paper to represent my soul. Within the circle shedraws an equidistant cross with more of the sugar, symbolizing the Southern Cross and the Tiwantinesuyu cosmology — the animistic worldview held by all Andean medicine people. This representation also acknowledges that the allyu (group, community, family, collectivity) comes before the individual, which is an antithetical belief for many of us living in the northern hemisphere where individuality is placed before all else. Discovering the llama fat, doña Berna uses it to hold together three carnation buds — two white buds flanking a red one — then sings a prayer to bring heaven (white) and earth (red) together. Handing me a woven bag containing coca leaves, she gestures for me to make a k’intu. I imprint a prayer asking that help so I can consciously restore ayni to every aspect of my life, and my way of being. Doña Berna stops me, and corrects my “blowing” technique so the prayer and breath are one. Handing the k’intu to her, she layers a prayer upon mine and places it in the despacho. Handing me a k’intu she says, “Familia.” This time I properly imprint my prayer with breath — may Rick, my brother, my mother, and all of my relations be helped to restore ayni to their lives. Again, doña Berna adds her prayer and places it in the despacho. She hands me another k’intu and instructs, “Salud.” This prayer specifically asks for help in restoring ayni to my health. Additionally, I ask to become more available in my relationship to Pachamama. More k’intus are passed to me. Not being conversant in Spanish and without the interpreter to translate, I have no idea what doña Berna wants me to imprint. I take each k’intu and blow similar prayers, but with different articulations — conscious awareness to “see” the quality of my relationship so I may restore them to ayni; help in recapitulating my life so I can see clearly the beliefs and affinities that are not in ayni with my becoming; assistance with opening my heart more fully so my relationships become more unconditional, etc. Passing them back, doña Berna adds her prayers to each k’intu before placing them in the despacho. One last k’intu. This time I ask that ayni be restored to my client and her father. This, too, receives doña Berna’s prayers and is placed in the despacho. In all, I make a dozen or more k’intus.
Handing me more small newsprint wrapped packets, doña Berna motions for me to continue opening them. I am fascinated by all the things they contain. She methodically reaches for packet after packet building a mandala — rich with color, texture, size and shapes. Inside one packet she pulls out fake paper money and removes a $100 bill, and with a smile adds it to the despacho — abundance and a successful despacho she mimes. Lastly, doña Berna sprinkles multi-colored confetti over the entire despacho, and motions for me to do the same. Later, I learn this is a metaphor for celebrating life.
After the completed despacho is folded and tied with red thread, doña Berna adds a flower bud and cleanses my luminous energy field with it. Then, handing the despacho to me, she rubs her mesa over it. My hands vibrate — the energy contained in the despacho and in her mesa is strong and warm. Ceremony complete, I wrap my arms around doña Berna. When we disengage, tears are streaming down my face. Taking her sleeve, doña Berna wipes them away. With a big grin, I motion they are tears of joy!
Floating. Suzi and Jerry point me in the direction they are heading — the lounge for more matte de coca. Tired, but not sleepy, Suzi and I head back to our room around 11:00 p.m. to recapitulate the fullness of the day and read a few more chapters of our respective books.
Pachamama, the archetypal symbol for feminine, earth energy is the principle realm that pampamesayoq medicine people work. Each shaman traveling with us is a pampamesayoq. In contrast, the apus symbolize the masculine energy associated with Spirit, which is principally the domain of altomesayoq shamans.
The interpreter continues, “don Mariano says ‘you will know in our hearts whether it is principally Pachamama or the apus that inform you and pull you to serve yourselves and others.’” Hearing this, I flash to my dream in Cuzco — I was called to Ausangate to remember the original matrix embedded in my luminous energy field. This matrix will reveal the vision for my Becoming — a vision organized around cooperation, collaboration, respect and honor for the benefit of all life.
In closing, don Mariano tells us he has had many mentors who taught him to trust the visions he receives through the coca leaves. “Each healer develops their own way. I have always found it most beneficial to be in close contact with both the apus and Pachamama.”
Since my healing session with doña Berna has been rescheduled for an hour later, I join several others for a hot cup of matta de coca in the lounge. Not surprisingly our conversation revolves around the information don Mariano shared with us. Turning to Jerry, I ask if he is willing to balance my energy centers, which will ground me in my body so I can be fully present for this evening’s healing session.
I love experiencing this form of energy work — to feel suspended in weightlessness and timelessness, and connected by thin luminous threads to the heartbeat of the Universe. It opens me to receive information that is not filtered by my ego or past experience. As a daily practice, I spend time in expanded states of consciousness, but because there are no other practitioners in this tradition who live near, times like this are a real treat.
Jerry has a gift for creating beautiful sacred space and ceremony. After lighting incense, he calls in the directions and lineage to be present and work through him. Lying on my bed, he kneels beside it and reminds me to use my breathing to connect to my essential Self. Twenty-minutes later, the attunement complete, I am totally relaxed and my mind is at peace. During dinner, Jerry shares his experience and the silent conversations he had to bring my energy centers into balance. This information, coupled with my own experience, confirms that the despacho healing from doña Berna will be for ayni.
A Healing Session with doña Berna
Doña Berna is readying her space when I arrive. Laid out before her is a piece of white wrapping paper. Smiling broadly, we greet each other with a hug and kiss. Her warmth and authenticity radiate. It is hard to believe that we just met yesterday. Saying a few words, in Spanish, I look blankly and say, “No” apologetically. Motioning to one of our guides, she asks him to translate. “Doña Berna wants to know if you want an ayni despacho?” he asks. “Yes,” I reply nodding my head emphatically while smiling back at doña Berna. I am so excited — this is the first time a despacho has been made just for me. Though I am seated and doña Berna is standing, she barely leans over to kiss the crown of my head. Placing a hand over mine, she smiles.
In Peru, despacho kits can be bought at a shaman’s market, such as the one near Santa Clara Market in Cuzco. The kits are wrapped bundles that include all the necessary ingredients such as sugar, corn, beans, seeds, confetti, llama fat and a dried llama fetus, as well as objects like figurines and a small shell. Each of these are individually wrapped in small packets of securely folded newsprint.
Opening one of these despacho kits, doña Berna hands me several small packets and motions for me to open them. This will clearly be a healing and teaching session! Carefully, we open the despacho ingredients. Once the sugar is found, doña Berna begins constructing the despacho. Some of the sugar is used to make a circle on the wrapping paper to represent my soul. Within the circle shedraws an equidistant cross with more of the sugar, symbolizing the Southern Cross and the Tiwantinesuyu cosmology — the animistic worldview held by all Andean medicine people. This representation also acknowledges that the allyu (group, community, family, collectivity) comes before the individual, which is an antithetical belief for many of us living in the northern hemisphere where individuality is placed before all else. Discovering the llama fat, doña Berna uses it to hold together three carnation buds — two white buds flanking a red one — then sings a prayer to bring heaven (white) and earth (red) together. Handing me a woven bag containing coca leaves, she gestures for me to make a k’intu. I imprint a prayer asking that help so I can consciously restore ayni to every aspect of my life, and my way of being. Doña Berna stops me, and corrects my “blowing” technique so the prayer and breath are one. Handing the k’intu to her, she layers a prayer upon mine and places it in the despacho. Handing me a k’intu she says, “Familia.” This time I properly imprint my prayer with breath — may Rick, my brother, my mother, and all of my relations be helped to restore ayni to their lives. Again, doña Berna adds her prayer and places it in the despacho. She hands me another k’intu and instructs, “Salud.” This prayer specifically asks for help in restoring ayni to my health. Additionally, I ask to become more available in my relationship to Pachamama. More k’intus are passed to me. Not being conversant in Spanish and without the interpreter to translate, I have no idea what doña Berna wants me to imprint. I take each k’intu and blow similar prayers, but with different articulations — conscious awareness to “see” the quality of my relationship so I may restore them to ayni; help in recapitulating my life so I can see clearly the beliefs and affinities that are not in ayni with my becoming; assistance with opening my heart more fully so my relationships become more unconditional, etc. Passing them back, doña Berna adds her prayers to each k’intu before placing them in the despacho. One last k’intu. This time I ask that ayni be restored to my client and her father. This, too, receives doña Berna’s prayers and is placed in the despacho. In all, I make a dozen or more k’intus.
Handing me more small newsprint wrapped packets, doña Berna motions for me to continue opening them. I am fascinated by all the things they contain. She methodically reaches for packet after packet building a mandala — rich with color, texture, size and shapes. Inside one packet she pulls out fake paper money and removes a $100 bill, and with a smile adds it to the despacho — abundance and a successful despacho she mimes. Lastly, doña Berna sprinkles multi-colored confetti over the entire despacho, and motions for me to do the same. Later, I learn this is a metaphor for celebrating life.
After the completed despacho is folded and tied with red thread, doña Berna adds a flower bud and cleanses my luminous energy field with it. Then, handing the despacho to me, she rubs her mesa over it. My hands vibrate — the energy contained in the despacho and in her mesa is strong and warm. Ceremony complete, I wrap my arms around doña Berna. When we disengage, tears are streaming down my face. Taking her sleeve, doña Berna wipes them away. With a big grin, I motion they are tears of joy!
Floating. Suzi and Jerry point me in the direction they are heading — the lounge for more matte de coca. Tired, but not sleepy, Suzi and I head back to our room around 11:00 p.m. to recapitulate the fullness of the day and read a few more chapters of our respective books.